The Man Tells It Like It Is...

Oh Bill Maher, why is it that only you Jon Stewart can speak the truth in this crazy society of ours? Whatever the reason, thank the sweet baby Jesus he does:

What are you, Harriet? We need to know. We don't trust Bush anymore, so we're not going to play, "It's Pat" with you. Because there are only three possibilities if you've never married or had kids by 60. She's either an asexual figure, sort of like Clay Aiken without all the estrogen. You know, androgynous, like the way we thought about Michael Jackson back when we still liked his records. But this sort of barrenness is threatening to the Republican base because they're generally people who hate sex and are bad at it. So they fear that their own population will dwindle because there won't be enough Republicans willing to f*** each other.

Harriet Miers isn't using the equipment God gave her for making babies, and that's just wrong. It's like God giving you a beautiful garden and you not strip mining it for coal.

Now, possibility two is that Harriet Miers is a practicing lesbian, which is sinful if done correctly. But here's where it gets thorny, because if she's not a lesbian and she's not a virgin, well, then she must be a slut!

Makes sense to me...